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What makes a person special?
Why do some people stand out effortlessly in the crowd?
Why do the memories of some persons linger long after they’re gone?
Why do I seek love and attention from one out of so many?
Are some persons born to be special?
Hi friends, hope your week has been great? I want to share a few thoughts on a mystified subset of the human race called Special People.
Y’al remember that one person (in class, at work or at home) who seems so different (effortlessly). The guy every girl wants to hang out with. The girl on whom almost every piece of clothing looks nice. I can recall so many, more especially the ones whose mannerisms I try to imitate – though they hardly show it if they are flattered by my poor attempts at mimicry. Besides, my heightened sense of self (or is it superiority complex??) wont let my acting skills take root. So I’ve been thinking… Who are these people? How do they attain this status?
My answer isn’t very straightforward (I know I know, my answers are usually not), but I hope you enjoy the read… *wink*
For purposes of clarity, lemme quickly say that this post is not meant to rehash the old assertion – ‘everyone is unique’. Everyone is unique means no two persons are same, but it doesn’t sufficiently imply that everyone is special. Never mind what motivational speakers drill off the semantics of ‘unique’ and ‘special’ and the identity crisis (especially among young people) attendant with taking such speeches too seriously.
In this post, I’ll try as much as I can to steer away from the trivial correlation (and often wrongly perceived mutual causality) between being unique and being special.
The Thesis: You Are Special
Geee I’m in a fix here! A person is either special or not, and that applies to you my dear reader. But I’ll just assume you’re special (I wouldn’t want to lose an esteemed reader by presupposing the contrary).
But then, that’s how it begins. One or two persons believing in you (family members most often), encouraging you and staying with you through thick and thin, while you’re being shaped into the person you’re meant to be. Does it really matter if their reasons are sometimes sentimental, unobjective or even wrongly placed?? No it doesn’t, unless you’ve formed the habit of not returning the goodwill.
Question: So how do you know I’m special??
Answer: Believe me, I have no idea. *scratching my coconut head*
But I could attempt a few weak explanations:
If for some reasons I seem to fancy you, then there must be a few qualities I admire in you which our friends may or may not fancy. You are special to me, but not to our friends (if they don’t fancy the same qualities).
Question: Can I really say I’m special if the number of persons who do not fancy me seem to be more than the number of persons who do??
Answer: Yes you can and yes you should.
This isn’t a game of numbers, else we may have to conduct a census. One sincere admirer is enough substance to the rule.
Sorry if your own case of being special is not the type that attracts friends and admirers more than public funds can attract Nigerian Politicians. Yours may be the type that attracts haters, burdens, needy people, impossible tasks, thankless jobs et al. You’re special still.
The Anti-Thesis: They Are Special
This time I’m in a bigger fix! ‘They’ refers to the other person not reading this post right now. Lemme also assume they’re special (it would be unfair to say they’re not in their absence).
Question: How do you know someone is special, when you know little or nothing about them?
Answer: We really do not need to know so much about the person. Treat someone like he’s special, and he acts like he is (at least to you), whether or not he truly is. Treat a so called (special) person like he’s not special, chances are he acts like he’s not.
Of course there are a few exceptions to this rule, but I’m yet to met them in person. Please contact me if you meet one.
The Synthesis: We’re All Special People
You agree with me that you’re special. We both agree that our friend not reading this post is too, providing we treat him like he is. The conclusion is quite simple but difficult to accept – We Are All Special People.
Question: If we are all special, then what’s special about being special?
Initial Thought: Is that really the issue?? Like seriously??
Phone a Friend: Errmmm I don’t know about that… If you’re special, good for you. All I know is that I’m special, and that’s all that concerns me. :Call dropped:
Final Answer: Would you be willing to treat yourself like trash and in effect become not-special, so as to reduce the number of special people, so as to make special special?? No of course.
Or you’d be like Raymond who refuses to buy a car because he thinks there are already too many cars in Lagos. So he wants to help to control Lagos traffic by not buying a car, not knowing that his decision may cause a fall in the demand of the car, which will also cause a fall in the price of the car, which will probably make the car affordable for a teenager, who may cause an accident, which may worsen the same traffic Raymond is trying to control.
When we do not take care of ourselves or we do not invest in our future or when we deprive ourselves of basic necessities just because we think some people live lavishly while others live in abject poverty, we do not in any way make the world a better place and altruism doesn’t suffice a reasonable excuse. How can it be, when one more person is worse off.
We are all special people, and we can be better…
I Am Special. You Are Special. Everyone is Special.
Treat everyone right and don’t think too highly of yourself.
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